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I hate hearing someone I know died because that's another person that won't get to see how famous I become
I find some girls so ridiculously attractive that I'm just excited to take up a few bytes in their brain
I was not angry when I heard a man had kidnapped an 11-year-old and then had two kids with her who are now 11 and 14. ...
I interact with myself in the mirror as if I were another person in passing
I have driven pass a rap battle blasting 'Sunshine Lollipops'
I always wondred if Pinocchio said that his nose was going to grow right now, what would happen?
I am finding that the key to my own happiness is: I have to actually do what I say I am going to do. It's good to have...
I like to imagine, when I'm really bored in class, the logistics of a spontaneous orgy. Like, who would pair off with ...
I have a goal in life... it's to be annoying...
I sit while people stand in line for the gate at the airport, but still feel compelled to jump in line as if I could g...
I worry that im the same person i was when i was 13.. i am 16
I imagine that slitting my wrists in a bathtub would feel orgasmic
I wear fedora hats just in case i have an oppurtunity to show others i can do the moonwalk in character
I don't respect my own taste, so I respect guys more who like the same musicians as my dad
I hate the current crop of reality shows about rich people, I want to see rich people doing bizarre-ass shit. Secret E...
I have to act out facial expressions as i read them, for instance when something reads "she winked" i have to wink, or...
I had a brief moment of hope, when I heard about Cheney's secret executive assasination ring, that it was actually a r...
I think the little bits of skin you chew off your own body have the best texture of any food product imaginable
I am never more infuriated, never feel more slighted, than when a friend is in my vicinity and doesn't come to see me
I f I could meet a girl who becomes crosseyed for an hour after an intense orgasm, I would marry her on the spot
I am very unsettled when the travel expenses on a business trip amount to more than my pay
I always have a voice in my head that's perfectly reasonable, calm, and lucid offering advice and analysis no matter h...
I like songs better when I can't quite make out the lyrics
I think oprah looked better fat
I once punched chuck norris in the face, and my face started hurting
I only listen to music when I'm happy, which is a couple days a month. The rest of the month it sounds annoying. When ...
I am scared of things with an inappropriate number of eyes
I wear hats almost entirely so I can put them on women when I go out
I always have to take two sips of whatever i am drinking, i can not stop at just one O.o
I consider opening up to people to be answering "alright" instead of "great" to greetings after a tragedy


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